Pre-Op days

Since I'm actually at about 4 wks post-op now, I need to rewind to pre-surgery (I excel at procrastination which is why this blog is just now getting started). So let's go back to about mid April...

I'd been stressing and obsessing over this surgery for quite some time - CRAZY emotional rollacoaster, and I'm not an outwardly emotional person. One week I was excited about it, the next day I'd be on the verge of panic attack and end up crying myself to sleep. This went on and on for months. It drained me. I got to the point I didn't care when it was I just wanted it gone and done with so I didn't have to worry about anymore.

So back to April, is when the surgery was officially scheduled for May 25th. Initially, I felt super relived like a huge weight lifted off me. I was so excited that it was finally happening for real. :) I was hoping that this is what I'd be feeling up to the surgery and after...nope, about 2-3 days later I had a full blown panic attack. I seriously thought I was dying (Thank the lord I didn't). So I was back on this crazy emotional rollacoaster ride. Yuck. :(  I highly recommend yoga breathing, it saved me from many panic attacks in the remaining wks leading up to the surgery. I also planned as many things as I could into those last few weeks, because I needed as many distractions as I could get, anything to keep me from freaking out. Just BREATHE. In. Out. In. Out.

I really am excited about this surgery it's just hard to contain the fear of it. This surgery really is a big deal!